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Sim Brother Series 4, Day 7 (Thursday 14 April 2005)
The Candidates' Debate
Previously in SB4

The housemates have been focussing on their tasks in preparing their candidates for the major debate. Steve has seen Dr.Phil who advised him to "get the snake by the throat", but will he get bitten before he can subdue her? Also, unexpectedly, working so closely together is affecting two housemates.


Unexpected Crush

8.15am - Martha was the first housemate up and made a plate of pancakes for breakfast. After breakfast, John and Martha are sat in the garden. They are not saying much but appear to be very happy to be in each other's company.

9.08am - Steve comes out and joins them. For someone who was going to grab the snake by the throat, he thinks that might not be a problem any more.

Steve - You guys appear to be comfortable.
Martha - (smiling) That I certainly am.
John - Don't sit there too long, dear. I'll get a cramp.


The Quiet Ones

2.08pm - Tiger and Bjork try to become better acquainted.

Tiger - I think we're coming across as the quiet ones.
Bjork - I'm quiet because I don't have much to say.
Tiger - I'm quiet for the same reason but I think we might have to be more outgoing.
Bjork - I like being quiet, but I can make noise when I want to. I enjoy cleaning but people seem to beat me to it. It is when I am cleaning, I get my inspiration.
Tiger - I'll remember not to wash my plate, then, if it will help you.
Bjork - Thankyou.


The Candidates' Debate

10pm - The housemates are gathered together in the Lounge. Two lecturns have been provided for the candidates, armchairs for the campaign managers and couches for the rest of the campaign team. Formal dress is mandatory.

Sim Brother (C) - Welcome to the Candidates' Debate. You will be asked questions in turn about policies and your opinions attitudes to different aspects of life in the Sim Brother house. Firstly, you will each be allowed to make a statement about what you stand for and why you feel you should become House President.

Alyssa - Hello, everyone. I would like to thank those who have already voted for me and ask for those who are undecided to still give me their support. If I was elected House President, I would try and run a happy house and unify both sides, trying to share the benefits of my position with everyone during my term of office. I would try and make life as comfortable as possible to those who are in the house through nutrition and gentle exercise and promote and develop a good relationship with Sim Brother.
John - Hello. If I get in, you'll know about it. I will reward my party by giving them positions of authority. Arnie will become Secretary of State and be responsible for security and discipline, Tiger will become Sports Minister and impose a rigid exercise regime and Martha will become the Health Secretary with responsibilities for nutrition. Marmalade with everything.
Alyssa - Isn't this a major U-turn for your party, John? I thought you were opposed to marmalade with everything?
John - Who said I have to eat it?


DESCRIPTION SB - The first question is about Death. How would the candidates react if a housemate died?
John - I wish. If I found a housemate had died, I'd more than likely be told by you that he or she she wasn't dead, they were just resting and pining for the fjords of Norway, even though I'd know they'd snuffed it, ceased to be and joined the choir invisible. When you're dead, you're dead.
Alyssa - I'd have a seance to contact their spirit to find out if they want to come back to life, then find a ressurectonomitron, give the grim reaper as much money as we can afford from the household budget, and thereby bring the recently deceased back to life.
John - Why oh why oh why would you want to bring someone back?
Alyssa - It's not fair that someone should stay dead if there is a chance for them to come back.

SB(C)- Victory & Defeat. If you won the election, how would you treat the loser?
Alyssa - I'd offer my hand in friendship and stress that I am House President for everyone and will do my best to represent their point of view to Sim Brother.
John - Like Alyssa, I'd offer my hand. Unlike Alyssa, I'd then cock a snoop, go "Nyaa-nyaa-nya-nyaa-nyaa" and prance about pointing at her going "Loser!! Loser!! Loser!!"
Alyssa - That isn't fair.
John - Who said politics is fair? Look who's in the White House.
Condoleezza - That's my boss you're talking about.
John - Yes, I know. Someone with a middle name that should rhyme with banker.
SB - If you lost the election, how would you react?
Alyssa - I'd offer my hand in friendship and congratulate my opponent on a well-fought campaign.
John - I'd sulk and claim the election was rigged, wanting to call in independent arbiters and get this referred to the Supreme Court and for there to be a recount, delaying the final inauguration by weeks and by then, my opponent should have been evicted and I become president be default.

DESCRIPTION SB- You now have questions on Immigration and Deportation. Firstly, how would you handle a new housemate?
Alyssa - I'd welcome anyone into the house and try and make them feel at home as soon as possible.
John - Show them the door and tell them, "You're not wanted in here, matey. Bugger off back to Barcelona or wherever you've come from".
Alyssa - That's unkind. It would be nice to see someone new.
John - Nice? NICE? Who said we have to be nice?
SB - Secondly, what criteria would you use for nominating a housemate for eviction?
John - If I don't like them, I'm nominating them.
Alyssa - I would rather not nominate anyone for eviction but I do understand that it is the way of the game. For those who I do chose, I would stress that it isn't personal and I would only be doing it because I have no choice and I hope those who I nominate won't take it personally.
John - What a namby-pamby answer!! Here's my bottom. Muah. Muah. Muah.

SB - Both candidates now have a last chance to make an address to the voters.

John - I would like to thank my campaign team ... but as I don't know if I've won yet, I'm not going to. What you see is what you get. A manic dictator who will do things his way.

Alyssa - Thankyou to my campaign team, to Sim Brother and to all those who have voted for me. If I am elected, I am going to make the house a happier place than it already is.


Outside The House

From our analyst's point of view, Alyssa came out better in this debate but whether that has any relevance to the final voting is yet to be seen.

We spoke to Zoltan Gorodetsky, who runs the Simbrokes bookmakers in Regras Gorge.

Sim Brother (A) - Thankyou for agreeing to talk to us, Zoltan. The big question we have to ask is who is going to win?
Zoltan - That is not certain yet. The debate could affect the final voting. However, from the US Presidential Election, the other candidate came across better in the debates but did not win. I don't think that this debate will affect the voting. I would like to be proved wrong.
SB - Does it look like there is a decided winner?
Zoltan - John is currently ahead in the polls and has a 7 point lead. I am giving him odds of 3-2 ON and giving EVENS on Alyssa. Results are not in from the debate so this could change everything.
SB - Thankyou, Zoltan. I hope you don't mind if we call on you again during this series?
Zoltan - Not at all. Can I interest you in putting a bet on?
SB - Perhaps on whether Manchester Utd will beat PSV Eindhoven the next time they meet.


To Be Continued

With the Candidate's Debate over, does Sim Brother think that the housemates have passed their weekly task? Also, who will the viewing public decide should be the House President?

This time tomorrow, your votes will have been counted, the results will be in and the name of the new president announced.


 


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