Our First Leaver
"Welcome to the Studio. Although we don't have an eviction scheduled for another week, the unusual turn of events that is not uncommon of Sim Brother III has given us a leaver. She had the option to stay, but instead, she's here to explain why Sim Brother III was not for her. Please welcome ... Britney Spears."
Britney - "Hi, Will. I've really wanted to meet you. I wish I'd got the chance to dress."
Will - "You look fine as you are, Britney. I'm pleased to meet you too. I just didn't expect it to be so soon ... but the big question on everyone's lips is ... why did you leave?"
Britney - "It wasn't for me, Will. That's just it. Are you as rich as the Will who is still in the house?"
Will - "Possibly, but I'm not here to answer the questions. If there was just one thing that made you leave, what was it?"
Britney - "Losing the task ... and with it being Will who plunged the house into eating basic rations, I couldn't live knowing it was that rat who put us like that."
Will - "Those are harsh words about someone who could one day be the King of England."
Britney - "Who cares? I'm the Queen of Rock. He can't do anything to make my life a misery. He's a whining Royal who thinks he should get treated royally. He's just a guy and I can't see him getting laid in there."
Will - "Which leads me nicely to my next question. What happened that night when you slept with Will?" Britney - "Slept was the operative word ... or tried to. He didn't make any move and when I tried to cuddle him, he just rolled his royal posterior over and was sound asleep. His snoring kept me awake. I tried for it the next night, fool that I was, but he snubbed me. I quite liked the guy. Not any more. He's a -" Will - "Ok, Britney. I get the message. What was your worst moment in the house?" |
Britney - "Getting kicked out of bed, obviously. Other than that, it was when the barbecue went up in flames. I nearly got fried myself."
Will - "And your best moment?"
Britney - "I don't think I really had one, Will. I liked meeting George, Ruud, Oprah and Hillary ... even Graham was cute in his bizarre English way. I'll miss those guys."
Will - "Who would you like to see win?"
Britney - "This might sound kinda odd but I want to see Graham win. He's outrageous, I find him funny and he's cute."
Will - "And what do you plan to do now?"
Britney - "I was told there might be a job for me in 'Crossroads', the British TV show. I'm sure it will be just like the movie of the same name that I was in. Otherwise, I'll do a remake of the Sex Pistols' 'God Save the Queen'" Will - "Won't that be a bit risky?" Britney - "Hey! It'll be no sweat. I'm Britney." Will - "Britney, good luck with your future career and thankyou for giving us your insights into life inside the Sim Brother III house." Britney - "Thanks, Will." |
Will - "Britney has left ... the housemates are down to seven and have nominations coming up on Monday. After they have made those nominations, a replacement housemate will be entering the house. Who will it be? Sim Brother has decided. Stay tuned to find out what the housemates have been up to today."