Hi there, I'm Will Wright, it's Friday night and it's Eviction Night!!
A bit dramatic, I know, but here I am with you for the first eviction night of Sim Brother V here at TSZ. Very shortly, we will be contacting the house and giving one housemate the news she or he does not want to here. Once again, you have made your point very clear as to who you do not want to stay in the Sim Brother house.
In a moment, I will be going to the house to let them know who is coming out. First, though, let us look at the events of this past day.
It's Day 8 in the Sim Brother house. This is the last day that the eight original housemates will be together. Yesterday, all of the housemates were cleared from having Bug Flu. On the afternoon, each housemate was given the responsibility for a different patch of the garden. Three of them had trees, the other five had vegetable plots.
9.25am Most of the housemates are up. Mia is in the garden doing some fishing and has literally got the boot. Johnny is in the kitchen talking to Trisha.
Johnny - You should have picked a tree instead of vegetable plots. They are easy to deal with.
Trisha - That's all well and good, but perhaps I want to get my hands dirty and get more hands-on experience of gardening.
Johnny - It also gives us time to go fishing or do other things.
Trisha - Johnny, I'm just not into fishing as much as you are yet.
11.37am - Harry and Trisha are having breakfast together. Harry finally broaches the delicate subject.
Harry - How are you feeling about tonight?
Trisha - I don't want to be the first to go.
Harry - Nor me. I will feel I've let the 'Reds & Regals' down as well as my family.
Trisha - Nonsense. You've been a credit to the house.
Harry - You have been an inspiration to us. You led us well and trusted us to use our initiative, but we let you down. You should stay.
Trisha - I hope I do, and you too.
Harry - Who do you reckon will go?
Trisha - I can't say. I don't want anyone to go, but it's all part of this game.
4.29pm - Yesterday, Snoop flirted a bit with Trisha in the diary room. She did not reject his advances. Since then, Snoop has not been as expressive and instead has been more flirtatious with Britney telling her all about his "weapon of mass seduction". Trisha is finding it quite uncomfortable when Britney is around, despite Britney supposedly having buried the hatchet yesterday.
5.55pm - Harry, Hilary and Johnny are fishing again. Their catch is quite varied.
Johnny - Who in their right mind would seed this lake with boots?
Harry - You're assuming Sim Brother has a right mind. What matters is that they are in your size, you can find one for the other foot and they aren't too leaky. Anyway, I'm not complaining. I've just caught a royal fish.
Hilary - Harry, I cannot honestly believe a fish jumped onto your hook.
Johnny - They're jumping on his rather than mine today, though.
11.55pm - It is now time to visit the house and break the news. They've been waiting patiently in the lounge, dressed in their best formal attire, for the past hour. I think Hilary needs the toilet, poor thing. It's time to put them out of their misery.
Will Wright - Sim Brother house, this is Will. You are live on TSZ so try not to swear.
Housemates - Good evening, Will.
WW - Since Tuesday, four of you have been facing the public vote. This might seem a week earlier than you were expecting, but that one is being replaced with another new housemate this weekend.
Housemates - Ooooh!
Gordon - Another ****ing person to get used to.
WW - The poll is now closed. The votes have been counted, checked and rechecked by an independent assessor.
The first person to be evicted from the Sim Brother V house is ...
(very long pause)
You've done it. With over 50% of the vote and at one time three votes in every four, you have decisively voted Britney out of the house. I will shortly be interviewing her for the second time in the studio.
Stay tuned to see what he has to say to me about her second time of the Sim Brother experience and how she felt life was like in the Sim Brother House.